Lock Stock & Two Smoking Barrels Locked N Loaded Directors Cut

Cover Art and Menu: 5/10
I would love to love this cover, since I dig the movie so much, but I have to admit it. This cover much to brag about. It’s got our handsome band of criminal wannabes, the tough guy up in the corner and the grand stamp of UNRATED. The menus are better than the cover, with some artsy graphics and hints at the action from the movie. However, overall this is not much of an exciting package for such a cool flick.

Features: 5/10

  • One Smoking Camera Featurette – Apparently this was a movie made on a very tight budget. This little extra shows a bit of how they got everything done with more creativity than cash. They had story boards for the movie, but for this scene they tossed them aside, lit it sparingly and did it all in one take, letting the actors do their own thing for the duration of the shot.
  • Lock, Stock & Two Fucking Barrels Featurette – We might be used to big fancy special effects that jump off the screen and announce themselves, but even in a movie like Lock Stock, which seems to have no real hanky panky in the CGI department, there are several places where they had to enhance things with the good old computer. This extra also outlines the different film techniques like using different cameras, films, and filming speeds to capture certain moment throughout the story.

The Movie: 9/10
My fate, my future happiness was there before me. The list of movies I was to watch. The litmus test to see if I was the right girl for him was carefully thought out, typed, and emailed across the big pond. This guy I had met online sent me his list of favorite movies, and I was to give him my honest opinion of each and everyone of them. Would this end our romance before it even began? If I didn’t like Chasing Amy would he move on to some other internet chatting babe? If I hadn’t already fallen in love with Groundhog Day would he have put me on his blocked list on ICQ? The pressure was almost too much to bear, and yet it was somewhat exciting.

It was December of 1998 and just that year one of the movies had made it big in the UK. Of course, living in the middle of America, tucked away in a small town I hadn’t even heard of it. Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels was mixed in among his other favorites, most of which I had seen or at least knew about. I already liked most of his list, I rented a few others, and liked them too. But what about this Lock Stock thingy?

Luckily, I passed most of the test, liking, loving, and admiring his choices. It was enough to drag him away from the Queen for a personal visit. Soon he sent his collection of DVD’s and in that sacred box was that one movie I hadn’t been able to watch. Finally, my chance to confirm that we were made for each other. It was time to watch Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels.

I loved it. I didn’t understand it all. I didn’t understand the lingo, the cultural references, or the Cockney slang, but I loved it. I passed the whole bloody test, which leads us to today and having been happily married for over six years. So, was it the pressure of impressing him that made me like Lock Stock? It’s 2006 and time for me to look at this movie with an old married woman’s eye, not the lovesick youth I once was. We got the chance to watch it again on DVD, so how did it go?

I still love it. I understand all of it now. I understand the lingo, the cultural references, and most of the Cockney slang. It has everything that makes a movie so much fun to watch. The story is compelling. The style was and is something unlike other action films. The characters are interesting. And, of course, it’s British. Need I say more?

The whole thing wraps around a group of four friends who get in deep with Harry the Hatchet for half a million dollars. Harry isn’t a man to mess around with, obviously, with a name like Hatchet. Harry also owns a sex shop, so there are always some interesting toys laying around, if ya know what I mean.

One of our four heroes is a clever card player. One is a straight-laced chef who doesn’t want to get into trouble. The other two are fast talking con men types who are always looking for a way to make a fast buck (or pound). As they find themselves looking for a way to gather up so much cash in one week, they hatch a plan that involves stealing from some guys who plan to steal it from someone else. It all sounds confusing, and when you are watching it for the first time, you might have to keep close tabs on who’s doing what to whom. Once you get a handle on it all you will find it’s one of the most entertaining movies you will have seen in a long time. I don’t say that often, and I don’t like to make promises a movie can’t deliver, but it will deliver. It’s a load of laughs, lots of action, and the twists and turns are smarter than most movies that try to do the whole twisty turny thing.

There are moments when it has elements of a mad cap comedy. One guy gets a hole blown in his new perm, while another puts a beverage down on a glass table which shatters, annoying the badass drug dealer who owns the table. Well, that one doesn’t sound so funny when I type it out, but it’s funny in the movie, trust me.

There are drug dealers who are scary, and drug dealers who are hippy-fied and laid back. There are criminals who are deadly organized, and criminals who are lucky to keep themselves alive with their stumbling and fumbling.

Did I mention Sting is in it! That doesn’t really make it a better movie, but STING is in it!! I’m a woman, what can I say.

The style is low budget. This was Guy Ritchie’s first film so he had to do a lot of creative filmmaking. It looks gritty and rough compared to Hollywood polished flicks, and I love that. The music is kick ass, from start to finish. It has a mix of old American tunes and current hits from the UK.

So, did this movie somehow change my life? Did I fall in love with the right movie-loving guy? The answer to those questions is yes. He has loved this movie from the day he saw it back in 98. Since then we have watched so many movies. That list was the start of something beautiful. Lock Stock was with us from the beginning. It’s not just a great movie; it’s a sentimental favorite in our household.

Value: 8/10
This is a great film to have around and watch whenever you are in the mood for something a bit rowdy, fun, with all that British goodness 🙂 The DVD as a whole isn’t much to write home about though. There are crappy extras, the cover is so-so, and the price is fair, but not amazing. I want it in my collection, and for around 14 bucks I can justify the cost. If you are looking for something other than a Hollywood flick to check out on Saturday night at home, rent Lock Stock and spend the rest of your dosh on something else. (dosh=cash).

Overall Score 8/10